Thursday, February 14, 2013

The call of the beloved


Love is…

Love is feeling cold in the back of vans
Love is a fan club with only two fans
Love is walking holding paint stained hands
Love is.
Love is fish and chips on winter nights
Love is blankets full of strange delights
Love is when you don’t put out the light
Love is
Love is the presents in Christmas shops
Love is when you’re feeling Top of the Pops
Love is what happens when the music stops
Love is
Love is white panties lying all forlorn
Love is pink nightdresses still slightly warm
Love is when you have to leave at dawn
Love is
Love is you and love is me
Love is prison and love is free
Love’s what’s there when you are away from me
Love is…

These few lines from Adrian Henry are the closest i have come across that elucidates the worldly emotions of love in words. I am neither such skilled a writer nor the keenest of observers of the plethora of human emotions that can bring me even close to illustrate my depth of love for you. I may not be good at saying romantic words but I do love you. They say that street of destiny is full of pebbles, and climax and anti climax of all the sorts lie ahead of us and things are bound to take turns for good or bad... But all i damn care is that all the roads lead me to you and you are with me clutching my hand tight never letting go.


As i think at all the things that we have gone through, I see a pattern and a purpose for a single ending. Our sisters' fiasco, our first conversation in the bus, your "ragging" after the branch change, my yearning, your break up, our simultaneous career-happy moments, our tough times during the sudden leap of fortune, our fighting spirits and the weird feeling of secret achievement now....all seems a pattern to me. And don't mistake it, It was in this particular order. I know that it hurt you so much to face people and convince them the honesty in particularly two things in this order, but today i can very well ask you to just let go. People can think what they like and there is no point proving anything to anybody because the more you try, the more they would suspect... And frankly, if all you care is me, give these thoughts a rest and try to start over and try making the world happy. And beyond a point, you can't help a diseased soul.


Ok sorry i got dragged away. Each day that we share this bond of trust, I feel more strong and confident about us. I may be weird in my own way and be stupid at times. But i only behave this way just because i feel desperate to prove that i am worth all your love and care. And this pushes me to do things i could never have imagined before. Among all these weird people around me here, I feel like my own when i talk to you.You give me a reason to smile on the worst of days and a reason to blush on the most uneventful of days. Sometimes i wonder that i have got things so easily that it almost feels like a dream. I don't care if it's a dream. Just hope no one wakes me up anymore.

It's crazy ride we have had isn't it? It has been a free flowing rivulet...with small hiccups all right. But what lies ahead are the true testing times. You remember the "challenge" right? We got to meet up to that and i can promise you that i will never tire of seeing you smile. Lots of hugs. Love you forever.  I cant believe that i am saying this... but finally...yes finally ... I believe in LOVE!! Don't ever make me want to delete this post. Keep smiling.
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